So you've finally decided you want a divorce. It's taken you years of heartbreak and soul searching to reach this decision.
You thought it was a you issue. You didn’t see that the way you were treated wasn’t ok. So, you stayed for years. But you can see now that you aren’t valued or respected and you are worth more.
You’re fed up of the arguments that come from nowhere, the walking on eggshells and you want a different role model for the children to their other parents behaviour and of marriage. You can’t take it anymore.
You know they’re a difficult person; a bully at times even. They have road rage whenever they get in the car, make a scene if the service they receive doesn’t reach their exacting standards, and you keep walking on those eggshells to avoid an argument. But nothing is ever good enough.
It’s exhausting and you are done.
Making the decision that you want a divorce is hard enough but you are scared of their reaction. You know they are unhappy too. You hope you can do it amicably but your gut feeling is that it won’t be easy.
If this sounds like you then I can support you! I understand.
I am proud to be an accredited coach with Sara Davidson's Programme and the DASH (Domestic Abuse Stops Here) Charity. I specialise in supporting people breakup and divorce difficult and toxic people. Breaking up is never easy, even if you instigated it. When you are dealing with difficult people, the process becomes a whole other level!
No divorce or break up is the same. And my approach is tailored to your own individual needs. The beauty of what I do is that I can support you in a multifaceted way and as things come up as we work together.
Often, the person instigating the divorce is thinking it is possible to ‘consciously uncouple’ but as the divorce unfolds it becomes high conflict or even post separation abuse. It can be very bewildering and a very lonely process with few people understanding what you are going through. If you are the one instigating the divorce then others may not understand why you are struggling with it, after all they may say this is what you wanted or of your own doing. Or you have been isolated during the relationship so you do not have a support network already.
Studies show that our health takes a significant nose dive after a stressful experience such as a divorce with higher rates of chronic disease. With almost 25 years working as a therapist supporting health, I can also address any physical or emotional symptoms that arise due to the stress of the divorce.
It is my goal that no one feels unsupported and alone during their divorce or breakup and gets through it with their mental and physical health as intact as possible.
I will hold your hand literally and metaphorically.
I can support you practically through:
*Divorce Avoidance Coaching - Tailored to your own needs as a couple we meet up to weekly with WhatsApp support in-between for 3 months with homeopathic and nutritional support as appropriate
*Draft Communication support - We can have regular voice note or email check ins to help you draft responses to your ex, legal and financial people to reduce inflammatory and upsetting communication.
*Preparing for a divorce from a difficult/toxic person -Tailored to your own needs we can have a 1 off preparation meeting through to weekly check ins with WhatsApp support until you are ready to drop the D bomb and beyond. Additional support to keep you physically and emotionally well can be included as appropriate.
*Navigating the Divorce Process - The divorce process takes at least 6 months from application to final order. I offer a tailor made approach to support you during those 6 months.
*Future planning - Divorce can lead to a whole new world that is exciting but can be a bit scary. We can work through what you want life to look and feel like. You may have gone through a difficult divorce and not be sure who you are anymore, you may want to start dating but not sure where to start. You may be physically and mentally affected by the divorce and I can help with your symptoms to help you feel the best you possibly can be.
*Blended Family Coaching - As a mum and step mum to 4 teenage+ boys and a little girl I understand how blending a family can have its challenges. Each family is different and again your needs will be different from others. We can unpick what support you need as a family to ensure everyone gets their needs met.
Why might you need a divorce and break up coach?
I can support you to:
-Reduce negative and overwhelming emotions and support your physical health to have a healthy divorce and reduce the likelihood of ill health down the line.
-Navigate the divorce and court process alongside your legal advisors - preparing you emotionally and mentally for court and literally holding your hand if necessary by attending court with you.
-Gain clarity on practical and emotional aspects - helping you see the wood for the trees and getting it all out of your head and into a realistic and achievable action plan.
-Take back control from difficult and toxic people - it is doable and you can do so with your sanity intact!
-Deal with an abusive ex and manage conflict - when to ignore or respond rather than react.
-Co-parent or parallel parent with less stress.
-Recover from abuse, gain peace and...
-Move forward positively and joyfully to...
-Thrive not just survive!
I'm the Divorce Coach I wished I'd had!
Healing Space previously trading as Healing Space Ltd.
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